as Phil Tandy Miller

as Beef Tobin (voice)

as Abe Lincoln / Narrator (voice)

as Dazzle Novak

as Shaggy Rogers (voice)

as Ned Land

as Dr. Josef Mengele

as Douglas Kenney

as Woody Grant

as Joe Pendleton

as Rose Dooley

as MacGruber

as Bill Martin

as Johnny McQueen

as Warren Maxwell

as Lt. Bruno Stachel

as Rod Drew

as Hal

as Jerome Malley

as U.S. Marshal John Travers

as Oscar Wilde

as Lola (voice)

as Pip

as Emma Bovary

as John Deray / John Davos

as Dr. John Polidori

as Richard Francis Heritage

as Jacob Weber

as Brett Dale